A boy was at school and his teacher asked him to learn 3 new words over the weekend.

His father is a pilot and taught him the word “takeoff.”

His mother is a zoo keeper and taught him the word “zebra.”


His big sister was going to have a baby and taught him the word “baby.”

He went to school the next day and his teacher asked, ”What are your three words?”

The boy said, ”Takeoff zebra baby.”


Empty bowl

An English teacher told his students that when pronouncing a word beginning with the letter “H” they should ignore the “H” as in hour, honour, and honest.

That day when leaving for class, he left a note for his assistant, “Please heat my rice for me.”

When the teacher returned to his office, he met an empty bowl.

He asked the assistant, “Where is my food?”

The assistant replied, “You said I should heat the rice for you, but you also instructed us to ignored the ‘H.’”


School field trip

An elementary school class goes on a field trip to the police station.

The Officer points to the 10 MOST WANTED list and tells them that these are the most wanted fugitives in the USA.

Little Boy says ” He is the MOST WANTED in the USA?!” Officer says “Yes.”

Little Boy asks “Why didn’t you keep him when you took his picture.


First day at school

On the first day of school, the teacher asked a student.

“What are your parents’ names?”

The student replied, “My father’s name is Laughing and my mother’s name is Smiling.”

The teacher said, “Are you kidding?”

The student said, “No, Kidding is my brother.

I am Joking.”


Sam walks to school

Sam informed the mother that he took a bad mark in English.

What you have wrote?

Sam pulls out his notebook and begins to read:

One day I go to school and I see in front of me a piece of shit.

The shit is green, it must be Marco’s, he likes the vegetables a lot.

I continue my walk to school and after a while I see another shit.

This one is dark brown, certainly it belongs to Simon because he loves to eat dark chocolate.

I continue the walk finding another piece of shit but this time it was really big.

It is definitely John’s; he is fat and eat a lot.

All right but tell me, what was the topic of the story?

You recognize a true friend in the needs. [/restrict]