Our Thought Life
Just how many angry words does it take to do irrevocable damage?
There are times when someone says things – hurtful things that makes us look at ourselves closely. And this is a good thing because they goad us to change. We become aware of our own blind spots and avoid collision. But if all they’ve ever done is tell you how to live your life, bully others and [their children] into living for them, you’ll put on your guard and live a life of fear. Someone said, “Life lived in fear is no life at all.”
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It takes guts to live your own life. It takes courage to stay within your boundaries when the battle rages at your door. Mother used to say, “When someone throws stones at you, put them down. Don’t throw them back, eventually they run out of stones.” Pile of stones can trip you or blind your view. Use them for good, like building a bridge, staircases, or use them as a remembrance of how you conquered evil with good.
More often than not, unkind, angry words goes back to their own story – their wounded hearts – which is likely one of loss and harm. Remember you’re not alone in your difficulties. We’ve all been wounded by others and we have all wounded others. Swallowing our pride and say, “I’m sorry.” is key to peace. Peace is where things are as they should be. Pride is just a mask that covers our shame and fear.
Armor for the battle is basically the reorganization [and disciplining] of our thought life. Think of things that are true, lovely, and of good character. This is a long process and it’s not a competition. It’s your personal journey. We’ll keep on plowing and planting seeds of kindness in our hearts as long as we live in this body.
Sometimes all I can do is pray: “Lord, I’m too old and sick to dress myself for battle. You’ll have to put on my armor for me.”
Don Miguel Ruiz says, “BE IMPECCABLE WITH YOUR WORD. Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love.
“Words have power to inspire or put down. What we say is very powerful, words have meaning that inspires actions. Let your words always be honest, direct, clear and inspiring.”
Remember that those who wage war are hurting deeply. Judge not that it’s in their DNA. It’s not. Carol Leaf says, “Scientific research tells us that few human processes are turned on or off by a single gene. Most processes require many genes acting together to produce a common result. Thus, the idea fired up by the media that there is a gene for this and a gene for that is incorrect. From second to second, day-by-day, genetic cascades are turned on or off by our own thoughts and experience. Yes, that means we are largely in control!” [/restrict]