Expectation is resentment in the make. To evade resentment you need to lower your expectations. Be clever about it. No need to announce it and no need to explain.
I want to love unconditionally but is it possible? Only God love unconditionally. I’ve tried and have failed every time. We can forgive, be kind and patient to those who are so afraid of your freedom, they’ll abuse you verbally or emotionally. Stress provocative people are everywhere. We make excuses for them by saying “they’re just like that”. But there comes a time when you just have to admit to yourself and say “enough”. Besides human beings are capable of change. People won’t change because they choose not to. Or they’re suffering with some mental disorder. A friend said that you can’t love self-righteous individuals who behave (words and deeds) as if they’re better than you (the holier-than-thou). It never work, you love.
Combating stressful life by detaching yourself emotionally from toxic individuals can be contagious. People watch you and emulate because we all long for some kind of peace in our lives. But know that a little stress, a little anxiety is good for us. It causes us to get ready for the talk, to study for the test, to meet deadlines and to get ready for the meeting and etc.
Under most laws, young people are recognized as adults at age 18. But emerging science about brain development suggests that most people don’t reach full maturity until the age 25. An immature individual can’t be accountable. His brain is not developed and refuse to be accountable for his behavior.
No accountability means that person blames and shame others and if you stay long enough that person will blame and shame you. Sometime in the form of complaints and excuses.
Stress is a normal part of life. However, too much stress can have a negative effect on a young child’s brain development. Helping them to cope with stress relies a great deal on the attachment relationship between them and their caregivers. That relationship is a key factor in building emotional resilience in a young child.
According to studies, we can’t go through life without anything upsetting us at all. That would be unrealistic. However, if too many things go wrong and a child is continually being bombarded with stress, the negative effects on their brain can be long term. If ruptures are not dealt with they can also lead to deepening problems with their relationship with parents, which may affect a child’s long-term ability to thrive and learn. The adult needs to be able to reflect on the situation and help the child recover from whatever it was that upset them. Even if your child is 20 years old.
According to brain development expert Daniel Siegel, ruptures are inevitable breaks in the nurturing connection with the child. What is important is not that ruptures never occur, but that ruptures are repaired. If they are not dealt with, deepening problems in the relationship between the child and caregiver can affect the child’s sense of self.
My mother always told me to be nice. One day I realized it was killing me so I simply stopped being nice. I mean nobody cares. Sounds childish and selfish? Maybe, but I have a heart and King Solomon said it best: “Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life” (Proverbs 4:23). This is necessary for at least three reasons: Because your heart is extremely valuable. We don’t guard worthless things. And second is because your heart is the source of everything you do. Thirdly, because your heart is under constant attack. Minimize stress of the heart and keep non-essentials out. ♡♡♡