“If you feel you don’t belong to this world, perhaps you were born to create a new one.” – Unknown
We first read the story of David, the shepherd boy who became King of Israel, in 1 Samuel Chapter 16. The story of David goes on to his death in the Second Book of Samuel. His mother is not mentioned in the Book of Samuel, but in Talmud (Jewish Law). Perhaps for you and I who are not Jewish, his mother’s name is not significant part of our getting to know the God of Israel. But it doesn’t hurt to know stories that made David. David, the shepherd boy, warrior, poet, songwriter, and king. What made him tick. The young man who slept under the stars each night and wondered “What is man that you O God is mindful of). The teenaged boy who killed lions and bears and the famous Giant, Goliath. When Samuel went to Bethlehem to offer sacrifice to God and to anoint the new king, Jesse didn’t call his son, David, to join them in the ceremony. Why not?
Some historical scholars believe that David’s father was with another woman (not his wife) and had the boy. (Read Psalm 51:5). We don’t really know but we can understand his life. Because of shame, Jesse, rejected his boy. David practically lived in the wild watching over his father’s sheep (perhaps since age 12). I suppose “out of sight; of mind”. Studying history clearly opened my eyes to see how we are all broken (since Adam) and that we do need a redeemer to bail us out from our own hell.
David was wounded deeply. He was that boy who stood on the outside looking in. When he was sent to the warzone to bring food for his brothers, they too rejected him — a family mindset. David was not good enough to be one of the big boys… a learned behavior from their father. “Kem le mekerar tiang?” It was then that David killed a giant with a slingshot. He developed his courage through pain of rejection and loneliness. I believe David remained with King Saul even after he tried to kill him with a spear: At least he lived with the king –a father figure he didn’t have at home. If he went home, he’ll be out in the field alone until he is needed. He remained where we now know as toxic environment. Sometimes we would rather be abused by Saul (a father figure) than to be out there all alone in the cold not knowing where to go next. Especially woman with her children living with an abusive man… why? She would rather be abused (in the house with food on the table for her children) than to be out there in the wild and cold environment.
We carry broken hearts because we were born into a broken world that doesn’t know how to love fully. David knew his pain well and he couldn’t bring himself to confront his kids and allowed them to walk all over him.