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- Feeling stressed out? Make a nice cup of hot tea and then spill it in the lap of whoever’s bugging you.
- I use artificial sweetener at work. I add it to everything I say to my boss.
- A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.
The only thing worse than seeing something done wrong is seeing it done slowly.
If at first you don’t succeed, redefine success.
Give me ambiguity or give me something else.
We have enough youth. How about a fountain of “Smart”?
I started out with nothing and I still have most of it.
The boss frowns on anyone yelling: “Hey Weirdo!” He says too many people look up from their work.
Things really haven’t gotten worse. We’ve just improved our inter-departmental communication skills.
Anything that could possibly go wrong often does – as well as a thing or two that couldn’t possibly.
If it wasn’t for the last minute, nothing would get done.
If our boss makes a mistake, it is our mistake.
A diplomat is someone who can tell you to go to hell in such a way that you will look forward to the trip.
To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a train stops. On my desk, I have a work station…
I like work. It fascinates me. I sit and look at it for hours.
I’m out of bed and dressed. What more do you want?
Experience is what you get when you didn’t get what you wanted.
To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
To err is human, to blame it on someone else shows management potential.
A man can do more than he thinks he can, but he usually does less than he thinks he does. [/restrict]