Time doesn’t heal anything. It teaches us how to live with pain. And sometimes your heart needs more time to accept what your mind already know. So trust God in all things. And like Job we can join him and say, “But he knows the way that I take; when he has tested me, I will come forth as gold.” Job 23:10
No one knows my mind like myself and how it used to be. It was so messed up and broken. My mind was poorly developed. I was suffering with shame as a person. I couldn’t think clearly. I just knew something had to be done but I didn’t know how to get there. So I began asking questions. I didn’t care if I sounded stupid. I was ignorant. Thank God I worked with some of the most brilliant men and women who were kind enough to help me. They listened to what I had to say as if I were an important person, worthy of their audience. I learned to listen actively. I began to study communication skills. That was over forty years ago. I’m still learning because it differs in culture. Even though I am a local native here I’m still learning. I lived outside if Palau more than half of my life. Its been a long journey.
True love is an extention of “self”. It should fill one’s soul rather than depleting it. Self-replenishing activity enlarges rather than depleting your soul. This includes a good exchange of ideas and choose to agree to disagree or simply “shoot
the breeze.” Men at Diangel and women at blai ra Mesei shooting the breeze. We all deserve a 15 minute recess.
One of the greatest way to replenish self and selves of significant others like your spouses and children is to recognize their need to be heard. The need to be heard is never outgrown as our children grows to be our peers. I was not allowed to express my feelings and opinions because I was a girl. So I shouted out of frustration. Nobody wants to be shouted at. So I was not heard. It was like catch 22… lose lose lose.
When I was young woman in mid20s my grandfather listened to my opinions and ideas which ironically made me think attentively to what he was saying. He corrected me kindly and taught me some of the most precious lesson in life by telling stories.
I believe that we have to be all scarred up to live freely and love the unlovely extravagantly, practicing grace to forgive the unforgivable, the undeserving jerks. Lol. We’ve all been undeserving of love and mercy until Christ.
Listening to others gives us a chance to love. To be compassionate and kind to lift them up even though you don’t agree with them. There is really no harm in trying. To listen is to love. Listen to the voices in your head. They’re always leading to the water to be restored.