BACKHANDED COMPLIMENT is an insult that is poorly disguised as a compliment, oftentimes rooted in the insecurities of person delivering it. (Psychology Today)
You don’t want to be ignorant, self-deceived and remain mediocre.
Someone said that Ignorance is a poison that kills love, friendships, and all the good feelings.
It’s better to be teachable and grow with knowledge, be wise and kind than to remain mediocre and miserable.
Backhanded compliment is: “Ak di chuluungelakel e sechelei, eng masch a rengmiu.” “Ngkora kmal ungil a bilem” is an example of bullying and insulting. They’re saying the dress doesn’t improve your looks. The comment made you feel small. It made you upset. Times pass and you are deceived to believe they were just joking. However, it hurts deeply, bleeding colorless blood. Now you’re 25 years old and you do the same to another you see as better than you. Damage emotions are like those basketballs you’ve tried to suppress under water. Triggered they’ll shoot out of the water at the wrong time. Deep in your soul you feel so small so… Ngkora ikel kesuar ra taoch el diak el sebechel mo chelellakl a lomes er kau el ungil a urrerem or something and will pull you down to their level. And say they were just joking.
Many survive by denying the emotional damage inflicted by a bully because it seems normal. Ngkmal klou er Belau, ea leko kerdiou ngelakle.
It destroys the heart of a child, friend, even spouse.
The way the mind works is always the same. If a person needs to shame, bully or put someone down, it’s to make themselves feel better about their own insecurities. All human behavior is performed for a reason, those reasons can be quite complex, and the person themselves is probably unaware as to why they do what they do.
Quick response: forgive them for they know not what they do. They really don’t. They’re insecure. They’re jealous of you.
In a personal journey you may courageously ask yourself: “Why do I feel this or that way?” or “Why do I bully a family member or my own children or a friend? I try but I always end-up criticizing and put them down.
Stay safe and say something nice to someone today.