“Can I buy a live shark here?”

“Lady, what do you want with a live shark?”

“A neighbor’s cat has been eating my goldfish, and I want to teach him a lesson.”

[restrict]

***

Calling Somebody

What do you call somebody with no body and a nose?

Nobody knows!

***

Blowing In A Dog’s Face

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog’s face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

***

Persistent Pick Up Lines

A guy in a bar, trying a new pick-up line, says to a girl, “Do you like raisins?”

She says, “No, sorry.”

He then says, “Do you like nuts?”

She says, “No, sorry.”

Finally he says, “How about a date?”

***

Guy: Haven’t I seen you someplace before? Girl: Yes,…

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Guy: Haven’t I seen you someplace before?

Girl: Yes, that’s why I don’t go there anymore. [/restrict]