Years ago, I came across a book by Gene Edwards – “Tales of Three Kings”. A very small book with a big message. I found the book to be comforting and healing for me. Edwards talks about the famous the three men – Saul, David and Absalom. Saul was a people pleaser. Saul lived in fear or not being good enough. He was more afraid of people than God. David, an anointed king waiting for his appointment and is being pursued by Saul. He lived in the wilderness always on the run for his life. Absalom, David’s favorite son, wanted to be king before his time and went after his father’s life.
In the end, Saul committed suicide. Absalom died while pursuing his father…Riding his horse, he got his beautiful long hair tangled up in a tree branch. The horse kept running while he was hanging by his hair on the branch and David’s army killed him. David was hated, because he surpassed Saul’s expectations.
Edwards points out that God sent Saul to kill the Saul in David. Incredible insight. Because in each and everyone of us, we struggle with envy and jealousy. (I can recognize the monster when he’s trying to creep in my soul… whoops! Day of Reckoning). David may have been that passive aggressive man who went out and killed thousands and brought their foreskins to Saul to prove himself. Saul only asked for one hundred. David spoiled his sons, neglected his daughter and lost them. Could it be that he had to release his pain of rejection by falling with Bathsheba? He begged God to forgive him for his sin because there was no sacrifice for adultery. (Levitical law demanded death). God forgave him! Read Psalms 51.
Jealousy is a green monster that kills your heart. These strong emotions like water have to come out one way or another. Water has to constantly move, ebbing and flowing, otherwise the water will smell. When your water smells, it is very likely that bacteria are present. There’s a decaying matter in the drain. It needs to be unclogged or the whole house will smell. You’ll never be happy. You’ll never find peace. You will always look sideways with a vengeful heart and use religion to coverup. Jealous hearts are like two-edged sword – cutting both ways. It always scheming to destroy others while you’re being destroyed.. It would be wise to learn from the life of these men. David, Saul and Absalom.
Karla McLaren writes, “When we can envision the emotions as our internal water element – as the part of us that embodies fluidity and flow, we can bring great clarity to our intrapersonal (relationship with self) and interpersonal (relationship with others) intelligences. Water is soft and flowing, but it can wear down boulders and mountains. Like the Grand Canyon was created with water and time. A long process of water flowing. Emotional intelligence is to know how to direct your emotions to the right path and build personal boundaries.
The only cure for jealousy and envy is to accept yourself and focus on your strength, not on what you lack.